Question 1

Do you use EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) for premarital counseling?

Accepted Answer

Yes, emotionally focused therapy is core to our approach. EFT is one of the most effective strategies for helping couples in premarriage counseling. It’s a method endorsed by the Journal of Family Psychology that uses proven techniques and exercises to strengthen your bond, enhance emotional intimacy, and address patterns of interaction that may be challenging the relationship.

Question 2

Do you use the Gottman Method?

Accepted Answer

Our premarital counseling program focuses more on EFT than the Gottman Method (founded by John and Julie Gottman). However, we incorporate strategies from various evidence-based methods to help you build a stronger foundation for your relationship.

Question 3

What is Psychodynamic Couples Therapy?

Accepted Answer

Psychodynamic Couples Therapy is an approach to couples counseling that considers how past experiences and family dynamics influence present behaviors and interactions. Addressing these dynamics in joint sessions reveals deep insight into each partner’s unconscious beliefs and attitudes, which allows us to bring everything to the table and makes counseling an effective force for positive change.

Question 4

What should premarital couples know about Financial Planning and Management?

Accepted Answer

Money management is one of the most common concerns facing engaged couples today, and one of the most common reasons premarital counseling questions we get. Premarital counseling aims to support you in planning for your financial future, including planning for bills, savings, and shared expenses such as children’s needs and household chores.

Question 5

What if we have different faith and spiritual beliefs?

Accepted Answer

This is another common concern among couples seeking premarital counseling. Many couples have different faiths or spiritual views and sometimes your partner’s beliefs or the beliefs of your partner’s family can pose a challenge to your future. In premarital counseling, a licensed therapist can help you understand each other’s beliefs better and find ways to respect them, even providing guidance for discussions with religious leaders and influential family members. This can lead to happier and stronger relationships, even if you don’t share the same faith.

Question 6

How can we cultivate emotional intimacy?

Accepted Answer

Couples in counseling often share worries and fears around intimacy. Emotional intimacy is at the heart of a fulfilling marriage, and a lack of intimacy is one of the most common marriage problems. In counseling, we guide you through structured techniques and exercises to keep your emotional intimacy alive and thriving. Much of your intimacy work will take place outside of session. With our guidance, you’ll learn at-home exercises such as active listening, non-judgment, and honest sharing. These exercises and techniques foster deep understanding and mutual support between you and your partner, leading to significant fulfillment in your marriage. Our licensed therapist will also help you with conflict resolution and ways to approach communication problems in a healthy way.

Question 7

How can we address past traumas together?

Accepted Answer

Past trauma can challenge even the strongest of relationships, influencing not only your partnership but also your family relationships and even your daily life. That’s why relationship counseling is a wise choice for couples dealing with this challenge. Addressing the past can be challenging, but it’s a crucial step toward a happier and more fulfilling relationship. Methods we’ve found effective for couples include:

- Helping both partners feel comfortable sharing their experiences and emotions. (Effective communication is key to understanding and supporting each other!)
- Giving couples new relationship skills such as active listening, empathy, and validation. These can help foster trust and connection as you navigate sensitive areas related to past trauma.
- Helping couples gain insight into how past traumas may be impacting their current relationship dynamics.
- Exploring the relationship and the role of each partner in maintaining it.

Addressing past traumas together requires patience, empathy, and a willingness to support each other through the healing process. That’s exactly what we are here to help you with. Encouraging individual therapy and counseling to address issues specific to one partner. Slowly introducing safe intimacy for sexual trauma survivors.

Question 8

Is premarital counseling right for me?

Accepted Answer

Some couples are hesitant to participate in premarital counseling due to the stigma around therapy and counseling. You might wonder if reaching out for help is a warning sign about a shaky marriage. We’re here to assure you that the opposite is true. Couples therapy and premarital counseling is for any couple that wants to:

- Have a stronger relationship.
- Learn effective ways to resolve both long and short-term conflict.
- Establish mutual relationship goals.
- Build a healthy secure future together.
- Keep the fire going in the bedroom.

Question 9

Do you offer online premarital counseling?

Accepted Answer

Yes. Our online sessions are perfect for busy couples who struggle to access premarital counseling in person. Sessions are conducted by our licensed marriage and family therapists who provide the same level of support and guidance as traditional in-person sessions. With convenient scheduling options and secure virtual platforms, you can reap the benefits of premarital counseling from the comfort of your own home.

Dr. Ava Fiddle, DSW, LISW-CP/S

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